Wednesday, August 20, 2008

I will go if you say you'll go, do you want to go?

With school starting next week, Tuesday was my last day of freedom. So, using this:

and dressed like this:

I drove up Farmington-way to what fun is: Lagoon.

My main objective was to go to Lagoona Beach. I am in the midst of my second consecutive summer with a Lagoon Season Passport and I have only Lagoona Beach'd twice, once last year and again on Tuesday. Thing is, despite being shorter, waiting in lines for water slides alone is a bigger drag than solo-waiting for coasters. It's probably either because the destination isn't as fun with waterslides as it it with coasters or that one feels more exposed on account of being almost naked. Also, little kids cut in line on water slides. The first time, you just think the kid is a little messed up. The second time, you take notice. The third time, you realize kids are taking over the world. It's so messed up. A flight or two of stairs ar full of (more-than-half-nake) adults waiting in a line and these little six-to-eight year-olds just kind of weave their way throught the line until they get to the top. Each time it happened, I just pushed air out of my mouth to make a "Huh...." sound. It used to be that an older person like me used to be able to physically assault a little kid who pulled maneuvers like that. Okay, maybe times were never like that, but I can't do anything about it (besides yell, but that would just make me look prickish) and the little bastards know it.

Anyway, I've said too much.

Being alone, I decided it would be a laugh if I made myself look creepy by riding on kids rides like the Paratrooper, the OdySea, and the Deathtrap (Puff the Little Fire Dragon). The lines ended up being long enough that it wasn't worth the laugh. Except Puff the Little Fire Dragon. I straight chickened out on that one. I got there and realized that the line was so short and all it does is go around in a small circle. I just couldn't get myself to get in line with parents and their kids, despite how much I wanted to be able to blog, "I survived the Deathtrap (Puff the Little Fire Dragon)."

Anyway.

8 comments:

lisa said...

you really should invest in a fanny pack before the Lagoon season ends

Lee said...

Danny has one. One in this household is enough. I don't want to start a power struggle.

Anonymous said...

Lee, I'm really impressed that you go to Lagoon by yourself. Whats your fav ride? I'm a Wild Mouse kinda guy.

Oh about the kids today. You ain't seen nothing until you go to a skatepark. When I was a kid I was terrified and in awe of the coolness of anyone skating that was older than me, even by a year or two, well now these s-heads will mouth off to anyone. I've even had kids make fun of my board or tell me something I'm doing is wrong. No respect.

Lee said...

Brad, you couldn't be correcter. I don't know if a jerk store for kids opened up or the Internet is teaching them out to be b-holes (from henceforth, I am stealing this idea from you), but kids have changed. Thing is, they should be more terrified of us, on account of more older people having pedophile fever.

While I can see where Wild Mouse would thrill one and even be one's favorite, I'm into the big coasters: Collasus (sp?) and Wicked. My third place ride is the Space Scrambler.

Judy Neil said...

I don't think people would think you were creepy if you rode the kids' rides. I just think they would think you were "special"

Lee said...

Below the belt, Judy. Below the belt.

Ninny Beth said...

It's lagoons like you who make me want to follow my students into the mens bathroom just in case. Not that I do. Follow them into the men's bathroom. um.

but I'd still let you and lisa make me a gluten free pizza!

Lee said...

"Follow them into the bathroom just in case" what?